I recently read an interesting article about “motivated ignorance” that describes our aversion, if not our “disgust” for listening to a political opponent. A study showed that it’s “almost as bad as getting a tooth pulled!” People on the left as well as on the right avoid hearing from the other side because of the […]
Frankly, once in a while, let’s admit that it feels good to speak about others, convey stories about them – whether they are true or false – and temporarily forget about our own issues, anxieties and pitfalls! I strongly believe that consciousness enhances everything. But even if our gossiping is conscious, is it really never toxic? […]
It has happened to all of us: Judging somebody without knowing exactly what was going on for the other one and then being wrong. We get caught in our own arrogance! Suspending judgment is the best way to keep misguided judgments in check, and to stay humble. Our ability to suspend our judgments is key […]
How often do we fiercely fight with our dear ones to defend a point of view that ends up being not that far from the point of view of the other? That’s what is called being in violent agreement. Being in violent agreement might seem like a less dysfunctional mode of communication than violent disagreement. […]
“No matter how large the tissue of falsehood that an experienced liar has to offer, it will never be large enough … to cover the immensity of factuality.” (Hannah Arendt) I found this quote by the philosopher Hannah Arendt in an article about truth vs. certainty from another philosopher, Max Popper. All of this in […]
As we know, being more assertive or decisive doesn’t guarantee being a good leader – neither does admitting one’s limitation, but it is a start! There is also no such thing as being just a follower. Good leaders – the ones who emerge as humble, even selfless, clear and capable of organizing others around […]
Thanks to Google’s research on what makes a team successful, it has become well-known that among the five top factors, the most important one is psychological safety. Meaning that team members feel safe to take risks and be vulnerable in front of each other. How much do we feel safe to be messy, vulnerable and […]
Yes, it’s humbling to see all the things we can do, say or wear in order to display competency, hide insecurity and be taken seriously. I don’t believe that a French accent is an asset of credibility – it’s a joke! If I take myself too seriously, you won’t take me seriously at all… But I […]
We all have “unshakeable faith,” or more simply, sacred attachment to beliefs and mental models that ultimately don’t make us happy or feel fulfilled. The dilemma of being attached to an unhelpful mechanism is captured well in the question: “Do you prefer to be happy or to be right?” It may sound like a “cliché question”, […]
When we believe that the needs of others are equal to our needs, we create a foundation for mutual respect. We enter into mature relationships. It’s easier to make compromises and negotiate agreements. It doesn’t mean that we won’t experience a sense of loss in negotiating agreements – a loss of options and opportunities. It […]